Fourth of July

The fourth of July has always been my favorite holiday. I've loved it as long as I can remember. For most of my childhood, it used to be spent with long weekends at the lake, seeing summer friends who shared our campground year after year. Before that we would watch fireworks at the military base where both my parents worked, sitting on the tailgate of the truck with our short legs dangling in the hot summer evenings. More recently, it's been going to see fireworks with the kids. One year, we watched from a side street near the city's minor league baseball stadium. This year, Grammy and Pappy invited us to drive to the other major city where Josh's uncle (a retired firefighter) and some other retired firefighter buddies help put on a pretty big neighborhood show over the lake.

This year was certainly one to remember.

Josh was working at the fire department. We had a brand new puppy, too small to leave at home for extended period of times and too untrained to leave outside in our fenced in yard (particularly on a night destined for lots of unexpected noises). Bruno had to come with us. And we all piled into my Tahoe, so we couldn't even bring the crate, just our laundry basked that he traveled in on our journey back from South Carolina.

We stopped at a Backyard Burger on our way into the city. We ate outside on picnic tables, so that Bruno could be out with us on his leash (and not destroying the inside of my truck). The boys loved their french fries. Sawyer loved his chicken. Connor loved his chili cheese dog. Bruno loved bumming for treats.

We made it to the subdivision, parked along one of the residential streets, and took the long paved path by the lake back to the open field for the fireworks show. The boys stopped to throw rocks in the lake. They stopped to check out the playground equipment. We hauled our cooler and gear to the clearing and set up chairs, blankets and snacks while we still had daylight. Trucks and ATVs started driving in to get outside spots before the path got dark.

And we waited. The boys went back to the playground for a little while. We had snacks in our seats. And soon darkness fell. I was holding onto the puppy, because he was terrified of the new place, the curious people who kept wanting to come too close, and eventually the noise. The boys were in chairs on each side of me, but they eventually moved around. Connor wanted on a blanket. Sawyer moved beside Grammy. Xander went on the other side of Pappy, away from Bruno, who has always bothered him. The show started. The boys alternated having sound canceling headphones on and off, playing musical chairs with one another, asking for snacks.

It was a really good show. It was a long show. The boys came and went, always staying within our group of chairs and blankets. But then the show ended. People started getting up, packing up and leaving.

And it was in that moment, that the world stopped. Xander wasn't there. It was completely dark. All the fireworks had ended, there were no street lights in the open field. We were in a strange neighborhood, near a rather large lake, and people were starting to leave in vehicles.

It was, by and large, the scariest moment of my life. My child with autism was not with us. He may or may not answer when we called his name. He could have been gone for a few seconds or for a few minutes. And he could have been anywhere. He could have headed back to the lake where we threw rocks. He could have gone back to the playground to play. Or he might have even taken the path back toward the truck.

He was gone.

I was holding onto a scared puppy, keeping Sawyer in his seat, making sure Connor wasn't running off, all while frantically looking around trying to think of where Xander might be. All of the adults broke off to start looking with their cell phone flash lights. Grammy went back toward the playground. Aunt Lynn when back toward the playground and lake. Pappy was looking in the open field where we'd been playing.

And then I spotted him. He was about twenty-five feet away, sitting on a little park bench that he'd sat on earlier when we were the first people to arrive in the clearing. He wasn't scared. He wasn't doing anything he wasn't supposed to. He was just sitting there, watching the space where the fireworks had been shooting, looking for more.

Scariest. Moment. Of My Life.

It all ended well, of course. We found him less than 10 minutes after we realized he wasn't in his chair anymore. But it was that quick, that quiet, and that scary.

Part of me thought, well, that's the last time we try something new with the boys and the puppy. This was not the kind of adventure I wanted to repeat. But, it was just one of those things. It was life. It happens. We all thought someone else was keeping tabs on him. We all were doing different things. And he quickly and quietly disappeared.

Xander isn't the child who tries to escape. Perhaps if he was, we might have been more on guard. He's just the kind of kid who doesn't understand safety awareness. He doesn't understand that he needs to ask permission to leave, to let someone know where he's going. He follows his own impulses. He wanted to go sit on that bench. So he got up, walked over there, and sat down. We just didn't notice. And he certainly didn't bother to tell us.

It was a learning moment. It was scary at the time. But it's taught us to be more careful when we go to new places and try new things. To make sure, at all times, that the kids are either directly in our sight or assigned to one particular person. It's too easy for them to quickly and quietly disappear. And it could have been much, much worse.

Meet Bruno

Meet Bruno, the newest member of our family. We picked him up on our way home from a quick beach vacation in South Carolina with the boys. He comes from an amazing breeder, Trailhead Cane Corso.

Bruno didn't think much of the long car ride home. He did manage to sleep in his basket a few hours, but mostly wanted to be in my lap. The back of the Tahoe tends to be a rough ride, and he was a little motion sick at the start. Josh said that just means he will fit right in.

It took him a few days to feel up to exploring, but he's quickly acclimated to his new home. He's trying to take charge, as his breeder warned us he would. He has learned to like his crate, though that did take about a week. He's sleeping through the night, which is awesome. He's eating well and doing pretty well on the house training (a few accidents here and there, mostly the humans fault for not paying close enough attention to the signs). He's adapting to a very noisy and chaotic house with three boys home from school for the summer and their CLS workers coming and going most days of the week. He's learning to like the leash on our walks, but he's still not a fan of the little yappy dogs who live down the street and have an invisible front yard fence. They're scary, he says. But I'm sure it will be the other way around one day soon ...

Now that Bruno is setting in, we've moved on to basic commands like sit, stay, come, and down. He likes the training treats we picked up, so it's been pretty motivating. We're having to work a little harder on keeping him from being spoiled. He keeps climbing up onto the couch when no one's looking, though he does know better as he hops down when he sees you coming. He also likes to sit on my lounge chair on the back patio, but Buster always did that, too. We'll do puppy training classes a little later, once he's old enough to actually benefit from the efforts.

We are so excited to have a new member of our family. Well, some of us are. Connor has loved helping to "train" him him, particularly being the one to hand out the puppy treats. He's been a big help taking him out back to potty and also cleaning up the back yard on occasion. Sawyer doesn't mind the puppy, as long as he's not nipping at his toes. Xander is taking a little more work, as his first instinct is to shout "No, Bruno!" any time he sees the puppy. In fairness, the puppy is usually nipping at his feet, too. But even when he's not, Xander still wants to correct him. We have to offer lots of treats during these times, too, to make sure the puppy knows he's not doing anything wrong just walking by the kids.

 It will be an adjustment for all of us, having a puppy in the house. I think the twins miss having an adult dog who left them alone for the most part. But Connor is very excited to have a puppy to play with. Mommy will love having someone to keep her company in the long hours she keeps at home while Josh is at work and the boys are at school.



Welcome home, Bruno. Welcome home.

First Ever Family Vacation

It's only taken us eight (or nine) years ... but we finally took our first ever family vacation, without the very helpful grandparents who usually invite us along on their vacations. Our destination was Folley Beach, South Carolina.

The car ride was a little long (about 9 hours), but the view when we pulled into our hotel parking lot was well worth the wait. The Atlantic Ocean reaching up into a beautiful blue sky with white clouds and bright sunshine. We left early after Daddy arrived home from his fire shift, and drove until late afternoon. We checked in, found our swimwear, and immediately made our way out to the beach.

The boys LOVED it.

Normally we visit the beach in December, when the water and the air temperatures are mild at best. They are sometimes downright cold. Not this time. The air was warm, and the water was warmer. It was a perfect summer evening at the beach. The crowds were thin (it was a Wednesday) and the tide was out.

Sun, sand and surf ...







We spent the next few days soaking up the sun and the water, both on the beach and at the outdoor swimming pool. The boys were happy in both places, though given the riptides, it was much easier at the pool.

There were some challenges, of course.

Even giving up the gluten-free-casein-free diet a few months back, feeding the twins is always a big one. They're incredibly limited in what they will eat, so our restaurant options were few and far between. We managed to get by with some pizza, chicken fingers, french fries and Cracker Barrel. And Arby's, several stops at Arby's.

Sleeping was also an issue. The boys don't do a lot of it, so it made for some short nights and early mornings. We also had to worry about the noise our two little boys make for our hotel neighbors, whether it was the vocal stemming or the stomping or the banging on the headboard.

And the long car rides, which speak for themselves.

After we finished our time at the beach, we spent a day traveling. We drove through historic Charleston, enjoying a scenic drive along the Battery and through historic downtown and the market. We had a late breakfast at a Cracker Barrel in Mount Pleasant, and then Connor and Josh took a tour of the U.S.S. Yorktown and the others at Patriot Point. The twins and I relaxed under a shade tree with our screens, iPads for them and a Nook for me.

And on our way home, we made a very special stop. We picked up our new puppy, Bruno. His breeder was located in rural South Carolina. New puppy photos are here ...

The rest of the beach photos are here ...

Memorial Day Weekend

Nothing says summer quite like a long weekend at the lake. The boys and I went to visit Grandma and Grandpa at their cabin on the lake for Memorial Day weekend.

The weather was still mild, and combined with recent rains, that made the lake a little cooler than normal. It, of course, did not stop the boys from jumping in. Because going to the lake means getting into the lake.

The boys and I left early. I signed them out of school after Connor's recess, per his request that he get to stay for that part of the day. And we got to spend three nights and nearly four days visiting and enjoying the beautiful weekend.

One of my favorite things about the lake is this view. Sunset over my favorite giant tree in the field. This photo was taken from the wrap around deck (the same on the towels are hanging on above). But it's also the view from my upstairs bedroom.

Visiting with family. Cousins playing together. Good food on the grill and good times. Days on the water swimming and sunning. Bicycle and three-wheeler and Ranger rides. Nights by the fire and s'mores.

The beginning of summer ... and lots of great summer memories growing up.

The rest of the Memorial Day weekend lake photos are here ...

Summer Days for Xander