Thankful

Today I am thankful. Thankful for all of the people who walk with us on our journey. Sometimes it's hard, and sometimes it's long. And there are so many people who are there for us, day in and day out, at a moment's notice or weeks in advance, offering us a helping hand or even two.

Today was one of those days.

Today was the day we took all three boys to visit their new school and meet with their new teachers. The official open house was last week, while we were still out of town. And two of our boys needed a different kind of visit, one with fewer people and fewer distractions, at least on their first visit. The first day will, of course, be another story altogether.

But today was our visit, the day when most of the teachers and staff members who will be working with the boys would be there and available to meet with us. And, of course, today was Daddy's day to work. That left me and three boys. To visit countless classrooms, explore new and bigger corridors, and meet a whole new team of people.

Only it wasn't just me. Pappy volunteered to drive over for our early morning meeting to help. He walked with us, talked with teachers and therapists, helped answer questions and kept three little boys in line. No easy shoes to fill, those. But he does it well, and so much more often than he should.

There was also our surprise guest, the boys' speech therapist from early start. For three school years, she has been with them. And today she came over to help ease their transition to a new school, to a new place and so very many new faces. She held their hands, talked to teachers and answered questions, distracted them when the moments got too tough. She was an amazing familiar face on a difficult day, doing what she's done every single moment since she met our boys - helping them find their way.

And then there are the many, many new people we met today. The front office staff. The principal. The teachers and resource specialists. The speech therapist. All of them, taking time out of their busy last few days before school, to meet our boys, to ask questions about them and ask how they can help with this big transition. All of them friendly, eager and willing to help our boys on this next step of their journey.

We were at school for hours. Learning classrooms, putting faces with names, talking about challenges and planning strategies. And every where I looked, there was someone else to be thankful for. It was a good day. That's not to say there won't be challenges, or that the coming days will be easy. But standing there, seeing all those people surrounding our boys, I was thankful.

And our day was only half done. Tuesday is also speech therapy day. And with Daddy still at the fire station, that meant Mommy and three boys. And Grammy, who drove in to town to help with the afternoon session. Who waited with two impatient boys in the crowded waiting room while I took each of the boys back to their individual sessions. Who kept them quiet and entertained. Who took us out to dinner afterward. Who, as she so often is, was simply there.

Last week it was Grandma and Grandpa, treating the boys and I to a vacation at the beach. Getting up early with two very early risers. Watching all three boys so I could steal a few moments peace on walks along the beach or afternoons with a book on the sun deck. Extra hands to help in the pool or on the beach, to take pictures for us when my hands were too full of boys.

Aunt Kelly who always treats Connor to special days out without his brothers and all of the special needs that follow them. Who always brings the boys something they will enjoy, whether it's the latest animated movie or a tasty treat. Uncle Brian who takes time out to show Connor how to throw a baseball more accurately or how to catch a ball in his new glove.

All the teachers and therapists who have worked with our boys, who have loved our boys like their own. The ones who stay in touch, who celebrate our accomplishments and talk us through our setbacks. The ones who are, and will always be, part of not only our journey, but our family.

There are so many, many others.

The strangers who help hold open doors when I have all three boys by the hand. The ones who smile with compassion rather than annoyance when my boys do something out of the ordinary. The stranger who tries to help make things better on a bad day (like this one).

There are so many other things that I needed to do tonight. I was up early preparing for our visit and would have loved to crawl in bed hours ago. I have a freelance project I desperately need to be working on for an upcoming deadline. I have a huge stack of school forms for not one but three different little boys that is due on Thursday morning. I need to be making some last minute preparations to get three boys ready for a new school routine in two short days. There's the usual load of laundry that needs to be folded and put away, the dishwasher that always needs to be emptied, and other odd household chores to be done. There's a puppy that is craving my attention. And there's even one little boy who cannot seem to find sleep on his own, even after such an incredibly long and trying day, even when he is clearly very tired and in desperate need of sleep.

There are so many things that I should be doing ... but I had to capture this day, this moment. I have been alternately pretending that it was not coming at all and worrying that it would not go well when it did arrive. It is simply a way of saying thanks. Thanks to the people who have already been walking with us on this journey, who are always there when we need them, and to those who are joining us with such open arms and welcoming hearts.

Today I am thankful. Today was a good day.

Last Day

Last Sunset, a photo by here we wander on Flickr.

Our week at the beach is quickly winding down. Today was our last full day, and tomorrow we will wake up, finish packing and begin the fifteen hour drive back home.

Today we did a little bit of everything. I got to take two different walks along the beach all by myself - one this morning and one again late this afternoon. Grandma and Grandpa took Connor on their usual walk and swim along the beach. The twins and I walked down to join them at the end, so they had another visit to the ocean. The waves are a bit too big and the boys are a bit too annoyed by being constrained to really enjoy the beach. There were lots of tears and tantrums on their part. We did manage one group photo (see here), all except Grandma who does not do photos.

After our beach adventure, we made the requisite stop at the swimming pool. The boys spent a few hours jumping, splashing and floating. They were not ready to leave. But then again, they never are.

Grandma fixed us our favorite dinner - fried pork chops and fried potatoes - and then we watched the sun disappear in the inlet behind us. I wandered back down to the beach for a few more photos of the water since all my visits to the water had seemingly included three needy children. It's hard to take pictures and keep three fearless children from drowning.

A long week of sun and sand and water. A good vacation with family before a big change. School starts next week, and I'm still not sure any of us are ready for it. Guess we'll find out soon enough.

Someone to Play

Water Boy, a photo by here we wander on Flickr.

With three brothers close in age (only 14 months separates the three of them), most people would assume Connor would never be without a play mate. They would assume wrong.

I often feel for Connor, who tries so hard to engage his brothers in typical games of kids their age. Whether its hide and seek or chase or even just made up games, Connor doesn't have much luck. Xander will occasionally join in a game of chase or run around being silly with him. But it's always short-lived and usually ends in someone's tears of either anger, frustration, or even hurt. Sawyer never joins in these games. About the only time he will chase anyone is if they have managed to get his iPad without his knowledge, and he will track them down in seconds.

Sometimes I wonder how much of Connor's personality is shaped by his relationship (or lack thereof) with his brothers. He is outgoing, social and always ready with words or actions to make a new friend. It's both fun and sad to watch. He wants so much to play with his brothers, but eventually turns to complete strangers, children and adults alike.

This week at the pool Connor has been forced to find play mates. His brothers, while happy to jump and splash and swim, cannot be talked into swim races or diving under water for things. They simply like to do their own thing, quite removed from anyone or anything else going on around them, their own brother included.

Connor has found many willing friends. I'm sure it seems odd to those on the outside, that when we bring three boys down to the pool to play, one of them always looks elsewhere for entertainment. It would seem odd to me, if I didn't have to watch it every single day.

One group in particular is always appealing to Connor. They are older kids, who play games that he is not quite able to do, but he always scoots in close and finds his way into the action. Whether they are tossing a football the length of the pool (and letting him sit nearby to take a few close passes in between the long ones) or whether they are holding swim races and letting him referee, he is allowed to play with others, something he desperately seeks.

I am grateful for the kindness of others, especially these older kids, who let him play. They have been gracious and inclusive all week long, without knowing how much it means to him and to us. I have thanked them for letting him play. I know how hard it would be to admit a younger player to some of their games, and also how tightly he can latch on to others at times (to the point of being quite obnoxious really). Those older kids have no idea how rarely he gets to play with other kids, to enjoy moments when his brothers needs and limitations are not taking precedence over his own. In the pool, playing football with some older boys, he gets to simply play and be.

And I am thankful. For his personality that is never afraid to reach out and take what he needs (and so rarely ever gets from his brothers). For the kindness of others that welcome him with open arms, even when he is out of his league. And for the parents who have raised these kids, who could have easily excluded him and went on their own way, but instead adapted their games to let him play.

Beach Buddies

Beach Buddies, a photo by here we wander on Flickr.

Routines and rituals are important for our boys, especially the twins. After several days at the beach, we have settled into a pretty predictable routine.

In the mornings, Connor and I sleep in, while Grandma and Grandpa have taken responsibility for if not getting up early with the twins, at least getting them up early to go to the bathroom and then putting them back to bed to either rest or fall back asleep. Grandma has a way with the twins that does not allow for disagreement.

Everyone manages their own breakfast, and watches with some disbelief as all of our neighbors start hitting the beach by 10 o'clock. We're still waking up and eating at that point, at least Connor and I are anyway. After breakfast, I usually take my solitary walk for a little peace.

After lunch, Grandma and Grandpa have been taking their walk. And as it usually includes Connor, it also includes several stops to play in the ocean. Connor is always quick to ask which building they have to walk to, since his primary concern is where he will get to stop and play in the ocean. He gets to swim at the turning around point, and then again when they get back to our condo. Grandpa joins him on the second swim, so that he can go out further into the water and enjoy the bigger waves that have been crashing on our beach.

After a few hours of walking and splashing, his next stop is always the pool. One must follow the other, at least in Connor's eyes. Some days I walk down with the twins to join them, either at the beach or perhaps just at the pool, and some days I let Connor enjoy his time on his own.

Then it's time to either grill or cook dinner (hence our big grocery trip on our first day after arrival). We prefer the convenience (and taste) of cooking our own meals on our own schedule, and not having to worry about cutting activities short to shower and change and make ourselves presentable. If you eat in your room, you can come in your swimsuit if you want. Connor and I like that.

And so we've spent nearly a week doing roughly the same thing every day. The boys know what to expect, and have seemed to enjoy their vacation at the beach, despite the heat. It's hard to believe that in exactly one week school will start back, and the beach will be a distant memory. Guess we better enjoy tomorrow - our last full day - for all that it's worth!

Another Day at the Beach

Riding the Wave, a photo by here we wander on Flickr.

Today we ventured out on the beach during the day time. Three little boys screamed all the way across the hot sand before they touched their toes in the edge of the surf. It got better from there.

Sawyer and Connor were all about the water and waves, wading out as far as they could touch and beyond. Xander came out from time to time, but after about 30 minutes today, he was done. As in, he literally kept telling me "all done" and walking back toward the gate. He was ready for the pool. After letting the other two splash a little longer, he eventually got his wish. We took all of the boys back up to the pool for a few more hours of splashing.

Another good day at the beach (and the pool) ...