School Days

Getting Comfy, originally uploaded by cheryl.

So, you would never know it by this photo, but all of the mothers were invited to Xander's classroom today for a little Mother's Day celebration. He, of course, was having no part of it. The rest of the class was up front singing songs (or standing in group at least), but he was all over the classroom. He sat on my lap for a while, then made his way here to the reading center, then to a puzzle center, then across the room to the computer center and wherever else he wanted to go.

My presence at school is not exactly helpful. I see this with both boys a lot. And that's not to say they would participate if I wasn't there, they may or may not. But my being there makes them think they are done for the day - done listening, done participating, done doing anything they don't want to do.

School is not easy for them, will never be easy for them. It will never be the experience that Connor enjoys so much. But that is what it is. And both of the twins are doing remarkably well from where they were a year ago.

During today's party, Xander did condescend to let his teacher hand him my gifts (made by the kids, with a little help from the teachers) and he did actually carry them to me, though begrudgingly. But the important thing is that he did eventually follow her directions. He also managed an appropriate hug a time or two before wandering back off to a preferred activity. He even let another little girl play with him (spelling with some bean bag letters) at the end of the day. It was cute to see them interacting, because he so rarely wants to share anything he likes. And I won't say he wanted to share with her, but he did so without complaint at least.

We celebrate the small things. A direction followed. Appropriate social greetings or responses. Give and take play. Social interaction. Sharing even when he doesn't want to. All steps forward from last year. All things to build on for next year.